Afew years back, I felt like I was trying to become in the work place all things to all people. My life was in a rut, I spent a lot of time and energy focusing on how to be perfect in the work place.
I always felt I needed to sacrifice myself, for the good of the project, for the good of my career goals. I began to feel guilty and this only made me full of stress and caused a restlessness in my life. I always wanted everyone to believe I was strong and unflappable. I never wanted anyone to know how much sacrifice I was making in my life to just balance job and personal life. I constantly felt I was sacrificing myself for what other people wanted of me, rather than doing what I needed to do that would make both of us happy. Because I was a woman working in what most people believe is a man’s job, “construction” I wanted to prove to the male energy, “How good I was at what I did.”
Now, for the first time, I am living without all of the negatives that were in my life that came from stress and anxiety related to an imbalance in career and home life. Because my life is now more balanced and on track, I wanted to share with you how I was able to get to where I am. It is the most exciting journey you will ever take.
I will give you techniques that are so simple, you will say to yourself, “Why didn’t I think of that?” The things I share with you work. And, you will see each day as a new day and a great day in your life. But you must check out my blog weekly to get that shot in your arm…that positive word that will change your life.
I ask you to join me with your words of wisdom, your pain, your questions, whatever it is that I can help you with related to life and ‘work’…this is why this blog has been given birth.
Women are expected to manage our home and our work simultaneously. As a professional woman with a family, I know that this is something that most women are able to do rather well. Why? Because, the skill has developed out of necessity, we are used to managing more than one thing at a time. If you too have children, then you know what I am saying is right on. These skills make us great at being a Project Manager, a Superintendent and even a Trade Technician. This blog is for all of us who wish to take that extra-step beyond and become the best at what we can do. Not, just ordinary professionals but extra-ordinary. This blog will tell you exactly how to do that!
Work related EXPECTATIONS
When we look at our expectations at work or what we are supposed to live up to, the most important thing each of us should do is to remember we are born to make sacrifices. How often did we hear growing up, “It is better for us to give than to receive?” Always, putting other things, people, projects first and ourselves last. We can change this attitude by working on some very simple techniques that will soon make us the very best employees ever and not have to sacrifice ourselves for the project at hand. Using some wonderful techniques that can help you get the projects at work complete and at the same time allow us to enjoy our families and ourselves without feeling guilty in doing so.
None of us are Super woman, yet, we all try and become this in our everyday lives. It takes a lot out of us to continue making these personal sacrifices. I will teach you how you have the best of both worlds. Get what you want in your work place and not have to sacrifice yourself to be the person people take advantage of. I know many of you may feel like you sacrifice a lot in the work place. This doesn’t have to be. I started off saying that we are multi task beings, this is the way we were born. That is why we perform exceptionally well in the workplace, no matter what kind of job it is. But, let me show you how you can bring “Balance in your life and your career,” so, that you can enjoy both and not feel like you are sacrificing any part of yourself to get there.
MAKING REAL “BALANCE”… “NOT A BALANCING ACT”
First, by realizing that the two, are completely separate……”PERSONAL LIFE” AND “CAREER”….THEY ARE NOT ONE IN THE SAME. You are not “what you do”…..”I am not “construction””. I do however possess certain gifts and talents, which make me really good at what I do, but I AM NOT MY JOB.
Secondly, I learned from years of reading, re-reading and interpreting a book by Patricia L. Mischell, “Beyond Positive Thinking : Mind Power Techniques for Discovering How Extraordinary You Really Are” http://www.patriciam.com/Miscellaneous/beyondpositivethinking.htmthat there are certain principles that are developed from (5) categories in life (1) SPIRITUAL (2) FAMILY (3) HEALTH (4) EDUCATION (5) FINANCIAL. You can organize them in your own order of importance. Next you can list your short term goals for each category. This is an ever changing exercise as 1) your life experiences, 2) influences shifting your being, your way of thinking and ultimately how you see yourself in context of “LIFE” and “WORK” also changes. The steps involved are the “Power” behind concepts and goals you’ve listed under each category.
MEDITATION & PRAYER are paramount in uplifting the innermost you, the “I AM”. Whether you believe in a Higher Power (God, Allah, Jehovah, Buddha etc) you must know that your ‘time with’, and ‘faith in’ the Higher Power is what gradually lifts your goals to the point of “happening”. In short, create what Patricia calls “Prayer Wheels” in her book. She tells you step by step how to make one wheel for each of the categories. You will have a minimum of (5) wheels total, between the spokes of the wheels, is where you write the specific tasks that help you accomplish the goal written at the center of the wheels. Daily review and meditation about the prayer wheel contents, helps bring about the “haps”, as I listed daily tasks that helped bring me that much closer to my main goals in life, including those associated with my career. Construction makes us accustomed to ‘processes’, and thus this holistic, deeply spiritual ‘process’ can be applied to creating balance by combining the documentation of goals with faith and regular meditation.
Make Goals under the SPIRITUAL and FAMILY categories, should be ‘high priority’ and very precise. Through the years as I have accomplished goals, I start the process again by listing the goals both short term and long term for clarity, and invent a new Prayer Wheels for each. Looking back at the first of my Prayer Wheels created back in the late 90’s, I see what I can now call Blessings associated with my early goals. Its’ good to keep them all, so that you can marvel at and appreciate how far you’ve come, which also keeps you going!
My next post on this subject will address what we do on the home front with regard to balance creation.